To answer your first question, feminism to me is the solution. Feminism is the ideology under which I can flourish. So, when you blame feminism, you deny my rights to happiness and fulfillment. Do you feel the same way about patriarchy? That patriarchy is the system that enabled you to be the person you are, or, let you be the person you want to be. That's why, when someone like me blame patriarchy, you feel threatened? Or, you think patriarchy is not the problem behind gender inequality and discrimination? The problem is something else? If yes, then what is the problem? Although, I think I know what your answer will be. Feminism. But why, honestly, do you think it's the problem? Do you even believe in gender equality in the first place? Do you believe everyone has a right to choose their own way and be treated without any discrimination, and lead a happy and fulfilled life?